Topic

funny

969 quotes

Quotes

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“I had the classic 40 meltdown. I did. It's embarrassing. It was pretty funny. But then I recovered. To me, it was like a second adolescence. Hormonally, my body was changing, my mind was changing, and so my relationship to myself and the world around me came to this assault of finiteness.”— Keanu Reeves
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“Hemingway seems to be in a funny position. People nowadays can't identify with him closely as a member of their own generation, and he isn't yet historical.”— Leslie Fiedler
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“It's funny, but you get to a time in your life when you think you have all the friends you will ever have.”— Liam Neeson
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“Very often, I don't make it through moments of recording because it is genuinely funny and absolutely ridiculous that a 60-year-old grown man is making these noises.”— David Ogden Stiers
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“I have only been funny about seventy four per cent of the time. Yes I think that is right. Seventy-four per cent of the time.”— Will Ferrell
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“The funny thing is I'm not bothered or sad about being on my own - after all I've never had a husband.”— Francesca Annis
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“I love things made out of animals. It's just so funny to think of someone saying, 'I need a letter opener. I guess I'll have to kill a deer.”— David Sedaris
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“Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.”— Jim Carrey
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“When I was a little kid, I wrote this play about all these characters living in a haunted house. There was a witch who lived there, and a mummy. When they were all hassling him, this guy who bought the house - I can't believe I remember this - he said to them, 'Who's paying the mortgage on this haunted house?' I thought that was really funny.”— Mindy Kaling
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“I love readings and my readers, but the din of voices of the audience gives me stage fright, and the din of voices inside whisper that I am a fraud, and that the jig is up. Surely someone will rise up from the audience and say out loud that not only am I not funny and helpful, but I'm annoying, and a phony.”— Anne Lamott
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“I was a hop-around. I hung out with the rockabilly crew, the guys who were trying to be rappers, the funny kids.”— Katy Perry
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“God writes a lot of comedy... the trouble is, he's stuck with so many bad actors who don't know how to play funny.”— Garrison Keillor
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“It's funny. All you have to do is say something nobody understands and they'll do practically anything you want them to.”— J. D. Salinger
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“To succeed in life, you need three things: a wishbone, a backbone and a funny bone.”— Reba McEntire
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“Books are funny little portable pieces of thought.”— Susan Sontag
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“A pessimist is a person who has had to listen to too many optimists.”— Don Marquis
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“I think the pattern of my essays is, A funny thing happened to me on my way through Finnegans Wake.”— Leslie Fiedler
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“The word 'funny' is a bit like the word 'love' - we don't have enough words to describe the many varieties.”— George Saunders
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“Comedy's so subjective, and if someone comes to watch, doesn't get it, doesn't find it funny, then fine.”— Johnny Vegas
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“I don't really get shaken very much. People could heckle me, a spotlight could go out, I could forget a lyric... I'm not operating on somebody's brain, you know what I mean? So I just think it's all funny.”— Harry Connick, Jr.
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“Great, big, serious novels always get awards. If it's a battle between a great, big, serious novel and a funny novel, the funny novel is doomed.”— Neil Gaiman
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“Experience is what you have after you've forgotten her name.”— Milton Berle
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“We've seen some insane signs: 'Is that a loaf of bread in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?' Funny stuff along those lines. Very original. One just said, 'I will do unspeakable things.' I thought that was very interesting - and mildly terrifying!”— Josh Hutcherson
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“It's funny how you never think about the women you've had. It's always the ones who get away that you can't forget.”— Chuck Palahniuk
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“Everybody knows how to raise children, except the people who have them.”— P. J. O'Rourke